I had my stroke on March 7, 2011. For the first few months, I would say 4 months, I didn’t understand the severity of what had happened to me. I was just in hell. I cannot be held responsible for anything that I said or did during this time. I had just had a massive brain injury and my brain was not working right. I try to use that excuse now, but I can be held accountable for what I say and do now. I just get in these bad moods sometimes where I hate everything, I hate everyone, and no one can say anything to me or do anything for me to make me feel better. It’s getting better though, these terrible moods only happen a couple times a month now as opposed to every few days. It’s OK, my mom absorbs it pretty well. During this time, I remember thinking that I would be all better within a few months – not so when you have a stroke. At month 5, everything “hit me” and I realized I’m going to have limitations for a long time, maybe for the rest of my life. At 9 months, I started to feel like myself again on the inside. I felt like myself – just a little slower talking and walking. At one year, things got better. I used to tell my patients that after a surgery there is going to be inflammation in the joint for about a year so any weird feeling can most likely be attributed to that. That is what I was told after I had brain surgery and it’s definitely true because I could tell a difference at around that time. All the inflammation in my skull was gone and things got a little better – not much – but somewhat better. Now, a year and three months post, I feel OK most of the time. I have accepted a lot of things about myself, about others, about my limitations, etc. There are certain things that can get me really down but for the most part it’s OK.
Categories: Recovery
Say things.................