New Life

I’m in the process of building a brand new life right now.  There are very few people from my “old life” (pre-stroke life) that I care about bringing into my new life.  Those people know who they are.  For the most part I want new people in my life.  I only want to be around people who are understanding, unfortunately most people are not.  I am recovering from a massive brain injury and even though it doesn’t look like it, I still have a ton of problems and I might have problems for the rest of my life.  I can have zero stress in my life right now.  Stress will inhibit my recovery greatly.  So no stress for me.  If you cause me to be stressed out, you’re out of my life.  That would suck for you, cause I’m really funny.  🙂  That sounds really conceited, but I don’t care.  This experience has pretty much made me not give a crap about most things.  It’s time for me to be selfish, and to help other people when and if I can.  Although I don’t think I am being selfish, doing things to make your life better – that’s not selfish.

Categories: Brain stuff, Health, Recovery, Stroke stuff

Tags: , , , , ,

19 replies

  1. Right on, Amy.

    When life strikes us down, getting back up may take a 100% effort. Others might give a hand, but the real work belongs to those of us who have been stricken. So our first obligation is to ourself. Then and only then are we able and available to make contributions to life and others.

    Keep up the good work on maintaining your helping blog. Much thanks, Edie

  2. That is exactly why I’m glad I had to find a new job in a different location. I can focus without negative distractions. Only my old college roommates are still there for me. Of my new friends maybe half know I had a stroke, at least until I do a brain reserve presentation for one of my groups, showing a normal brain vs. mine.

  3. I went through the exact same process — I never thought of it as staying away from people who stressed me out, but that’s exactly what it was.

  4. I agree and disagree… There are many people from my pre-stroke life that I want to hang onto, many who have carried and nurtured me. The others can go eff themselves and my world is better off with them gone. I am in the mode of jettisoning the bad also and opting for low stress.

    And losing me is a sad loss for those i reject which is not conceited, Amy, just the ability we have to see more clearly now, a blessing of the stroke.

  5. I “lightened the load” right after my stroke. Anyone that was “lame” was out. I had to put myself first…I could only focus on my recovery not all the BS lame people were sending my way. Out, onward and upward. It really helped me…good luck!!

  6. I agree. This hits too close for me to think of something better to say so that’s it. I agree.

  7. It is hard for people to understand brain injuries. Especially brain injuries to younger people. There is a strong division between sympathy, empathy and avoidance. You will find a new way to fit comfortably into this fast-changing life. And yes, you do have a great sense of humor. 🙂

  8. Since Zack has been in recovery it is REALLY interesting to see who has “stuck around”. We didn’t have to push anyone out…people have pushed themselves out. Thankfully, we have MANY amazing friends and family members and others from our church (who we didn’t even know well before) that have been so helpful and supportive. Zack has told a number of people that he wanted them to leave during visits (haha) and they have all said “okay!” And still come back to pop in and say they were thinking about him and praying for him. We feel very blessed. All that to say, I hear ya! My sister threw a bizarre fit before Zack even got diagnosed, right after his first neuro appt. Because she didn’t like the way I talked to her. I told my mom that if she was going to act like that then she could “support us from afar”. I aint gonna have that…if you can’t deal with me being self-centered and moody once and a while, then talk to me in a few years when my life doesn’t SUCK butt.

    Rant end.

    • Rant all you want, everyone that reads this blog understands all too well. I’m glad he has so much support. I did too when I first got sick but I’ve learned that most of those people were not being genuine. I’ve certainly learned who my friends are!

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