I’ve been told by multiple stroke survivors that they must have had it a lot worse than me. I know quite well what I look like now – but that’s now. If you would’ve seen me 2 years ago, 2 1/2 years ago – that would not be a thought in your head. This blog is getting pretty popular and I kinda feel like I’m establishing myself as an authority on strokes online so I feel like this needs to be said. After the strokes(3), I could not walk, I could barely talk, my ataxia and tremor were so bad that my entire body would shake and I would sit on my right hand. I had an unnecessarily completely shaved head due to my brain surgery. I had to be showered by someone, I had to be taken to the bathroom. Turning my head made me dizzy. I could only drink out of cups that had a lid on them, even using my “good” hand. If that wasn’t the case the walls would get a shower. I had to be fed for the first month. I would get debilitating migraines every week that would last for 3 days and make me vomit. And throughout all of this, I was completely cognitively intact on the inside but NO ONE treated me as such. I looked like hell and felt even worse. I was told by an extremely arrogant neurologist at a year and a half that my recovery was over. I mailed that doctor a copy of Stronger After Stroke and said “please read this book and stop saying that to patients.” I HIGHLY doubt he read it.
Well I pretty much said “F that, I’m not living like this.” There’s a reason that I look good and that reason is meditation. If I hadn’t been doing this work on my brain for the last 2 years then I don’t know what. If I ever work again as a PT, I want to work rehabilitating stroke survivors(I wonder what my motivation for that could be) and meditation and breath work will be a mandatory part of recovery.
Ok, now that I’ve vented and gotten some anger out – here…… laugh. 🙂