My life was devastated. That happened to ME and ME alone. A lot of other people’s lives were greatly affected by what happened to me but the actual trauma – that was mine and only mine. It didn’t happen to my parents, it didn’t happen to my significant other at the time, it happened to ME. I spent A LOT of time feeling incredibly guilty for all the help people gave me and things that people did for me but never again. It feels good to help people and I have realized that I am the one who got sick, I am the one who was extremely vulnerable, I am the one whose life was shattered, I am the one who had to find reasons to keep on living and make my life better. And I got very little help in this endeavour. I was told after the stroke that I was being extremely selfish. Saying that to me was unbelievably cruel but you know what, maybe I was. That’s the way I had to be and all really sick people have to be. You have to be extremely selfish and put yourself first if you have any chance of recovering.
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