Shattered Life

A few months ago, I promised to start blogging again consistently and I haven’t so I want to apologize to anyone that might have been counting on that.  I got a lot of heartwarming messages that made me cry having to do with how much this blog helps people feel connected to others going through this hell.  Because absolutely NO ONE in real life will understand or come close to understanding anything unless they’ve had a stroke themselves.  You can explain things until you’re blue in the face and you may think someone finally understands something – TRUST ME, THEY DON’T.

Having a stroke will either completely destroy or drastically alter your life as you know it.  I know of zero exceptions to this rule.  Your choices are to figure out how to continue to live in your messed up body with a messed up brain, or not.  You will most likely go back and forth with your decisions for years to come.

The reason I’m doing a post right now is because a really cool (seeming) lady (I don’t know her) e-mailed me about a documentary she is making.  She had a stroke at the age of 33 so she gets to go through life in a disabled body just like me.  Hopefully, she’s had more luck with being around understanding, sensitive people than I have.  She sent me a link to a 2-minute teaser of the documentary she is making and asked that I share.  I think it’s awesome and am happy to share it.

She is “hoping to do something good with my shattered life.  I’m trying to convey to people what my life is like with pain/disability/a shattered sense of identity.”  Those are her words.

Here is the teaser.

Watch this ↑↑↑

sick cat

Categories: Miscellaneous, Recovery, Stroke stuff

Tags: ,

12 replies

  1. Reblogged this on Random and Sundry Things and commented:
    I had to share this as a stroke survivor with dystonia. Watch the teaser video!

  2. I can’t find the words to express how much it means to read your blog.

    I’m also considering writing more openly about having a stroke and enduring endless chronic pain and twisting limbs due to post-stroke dystonia. It’s hard for people to understand, and I’m an author, which makes it worse in a sense, since I should be able to express myself well.

    Just know you’re not alone. Thank you for this!

  3. I think I’ve said this before, it’s the sharing of ones life that let’s others see their own humanity. <— I just butchered the quote I’m trying to reference.

    A shattered life is exactly how I should be describing the “new normal” me and my wife call our post-stroke existence.

    Actual quote:
    If you’re honest about who you are, you’ll help that person (reading / watching) be less lonely in their world because that person will recognize him or herself in you, and that will give them hope.
    Charlie Kaufman

    Thank you again for your sharing

  4. The teaser made me cry. I don’t suffer pain from my stroke (and thank GOD for that!!) but definitely have ongoing issues. Shattered life. I like that description…and yet when I say that I feel guilty because it could have been so much worst. Altered life? definitely. Putting pieces together that are a whole lot different than before …for sure.

  5. Thank you so much for sharing. I keep trying to write, but my brain makes it difficult. When comprehension and memory and (I forgot what I wanted to say) see I never get very far in my writing. But I love to read others stories (over and over again) sooner or later they seem to stick. Strokes rob us of so many things we need to keep our sense of self.

  6. Nope, we’ve had some rain and days in the 70’s and 80’s. It’s actually been nice, I even broke out the jeans. Very nice.

  7. Amy,
    I shared this blog entry with my close friend last fall. Several times she has told me how this made an impression on her. She no longer tells me ” You need to just exercise more.” , ” You need to put this behind you.” , ” You look fine. Move on”.

    Thank you for putting into words how I feel but obviously couldn’t communicate very well.


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